kaput

I can’t do anything. Really.
This isn’t one of those EMO blogs about how my inferiority complex is getting bigger than my ego (what total crap) but rather..seriously…I can’t do anything.

Proof:

Woke up late todae…made it downstairs..(my parents only count “coming downstairs” as being fully awake) in 5 minutes, shocking my mum who concept of her eldest ‘pride and joy’ is one of perpetual lateness, last minute work and lazeeeneesssss to the max. I turn 20 next year and I think my parents despair at me being able to survive when I leave to live on my own.
1. I can’t do simple things like NOT WORRY PARENTS.

Hurried to finished vacation math work (all 7 exercises!!). Was thinking that I got smarter over the hols and could do like 3 in 2 hours…..I came up with the grand total of 3 questions in half and hour. Not exactly blazin’ through the books. The bad part? It was work I learned when I was 16.
2. I can’t do math….and I can’t retain USEFUL things in this ‘ol brain.

Had a really l o u s y time playing for the band today….played all the right chords…at the wrong times. Sounded like this pathetic tinkly toy-piano… damn….
…why can’t I just practice!?
3. I can’t play decent music despite the thousands of $ dumped into my musical
education which I went through with much whining and complaining.

Came home after youth group. Was required to help in kitchen to get dinner going.
That’s right. My mum has never given up (or rather hasn’t learned her lesson) on teaching me how to cook. Me- the one who’s culinary skills involve making water in one flavour and MaggiMee in five. Oh, yeah…and I can fry an egg now without ‘accidentally’ making it scrambled.
Simple instructions: (a) Put potatoes in water and boil
(b) Put ladyfingers in with potatoes and boil
(c) Take potatoes out
(d) Take ladyfingers out
The potatoes were..um..crunchy. I realized that crunchy potatoes don’t go well with chicken curry. And ladyfingers don’t need to be blanched until the squishy white stuff inside oozes out. And that my sister can cook (and not to mention tell you loudly how you should be cooking) much, much better.
4. I can’t cook.

Besides that…I also can’t
5. Be a role model..I mean..look at me! I’ve given out advice like “I think you should
just run away, join a gang and die in glory.”
6. Act my age.
8. Not be emo
9. Read Japanese
10. Built a multi-million business
11. Drive….no..wait..I can…I just don’t drive um….well


I need an upgrade. Really soon.